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July 23, 2008 / Maleesha Kovnesky

The Devil Made Them Do It…

So my friend Carli is the source of a lot of blog fodder these days.  Turns out that someone stole her debit card…or at least the number.  The debit card was still there, safe in her wallet, so perhaps the thief was kind and sure to put it back.  Either way, the thief was not very smart.

Carli’s husband (HT) called her up at work and asked “Hey, did you buy anything at Barnes and Noble?”  He was checking the bank account online. 

“Not that I remember,” Carli said.

“Did you spend $380.00 at Barnes and Noble?” asked HT.

“No.  I would have remembered that,” Carli said.

So they investigated the missing $380.00.  Someone stole Carli’s debit card number, and bought the following:

  • $368.00 worth of Bibles
  • A subscription to Low Rider magazine

One is ironic. 

The other screams “Hey, here’s a convenient way to have my address at least once a month for a year.”  Unless of course, the overly religious criminal was purchasing a subscription for a friend.

Thankfully the purchase was made over a weekend, so the transaction was never entirely completed.  The $380.00 is still in Carli’s bank account, and she has a new debit card number.  And someone out there won’t be getting their magazine anytime soon.

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15 Comments

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  1. dana / Aug 6 2008 6:42 pm

    OK. According to the 700 Club, “those to whom much is given, much is expected”. So it stands to reason that he was “tithing” his upcoming earnings by purchasing those bibles and distributing them amongst the heathens. I can hear him singing now: “Bringing in the thieves” I mean, “Bringing in the sheaves”

  2. Aimee / Aug 1 2008 12:19 pm

    And yet, somehow, the two seem to go together. Bible-reading, church goin’ low riders.

  3. Carli / Jul 25 2008 8:31 pm

    I like the whole Amy Grant/Marilyn Manson duet idea. Turns out in my book-o-cd’s I happen to have a Mississippi Mass Choir CD right smack dab next to a W.A.S.P. cd. True story.

  4. Lauren / Jul 25 2008 9:18 am

    That is absolutely crazy!

  5. Matt / Jul 24 2008 10:21 pm

    I love this post. It’s like someone going into a music store and buying Amy Grant and Marilyn Manson cds. (They should do a duet.) p.s. You automatically go to hell for buying Bibles with a stolen credit card. I read that on some graffiti at an overpass so I know it’s true.

    Overpasses are where I get most of my information too!

  6. pikespeakdenise / Jul 24 2008 5:06 pm

    Now I understand Carli’s other comment. lmao That is hilarious!

    Yeah, a tale of a very dumb thief.

  7. romi41 / Jul 24 2008 4:55 pm

    Not that I would ever do this…BUT if I was going to, I would at least buy a bunch of super-embarrassing crap to spice up that transaction list 😉

    Have you seen Low Rider magazine? That’s pretty embarrassing!!

  8. crisitunity / Jul 24 2008 1:18 pm

    Carli, that’s even funnier. I wonder if the words “Bible” and “hog” have ever been put together to describe someone.

    Allison, there are magazines for every possible interest and sub-interest you could think of, I guarantee it. Anyone remember that Calvin & Hobbs joking about a gum-chewer’s magazine? Well, Watterson found out that there actually are magazines devoted to gum-chewers. Yikes.

    A magazine for gum-chewers. Oh, now I’ve heard everything!

  9. Allison / Jul 24 2008 3:46 am

    There’s a magazine called ‘Low Rider’? That seems a bit wrong too.

    Don’t click that link, whatever you do. Especially if you are at work.

  10. kaylee / Jul 23 2008 9:41 pm

    thats so wrong 😦

  11. Carli / Jul 23 2008 6:32 pm

    To add to the oddness of the whole situation, apparently it seems my “identity” was stolen by a very generous thief…according to Barnes and Noble, the bibles were scheduled to be shipped all across the country. At least the thief isn’t keeping all those bibles to themself. There’s nothing worse than a bible hog if you ask me.

    It’s like the Gideon Robin Hood.

  12. talea / Jul 23 2008 5:30 pm

    Aren’t you kind of set with just one bible? Are these going to be black market bibles? Sold out of the back of a preacher’s van?

    And what a moron buying a magazine subscription.

  13. morethananelectrician / Jul 23 2008 10:02 am

    What a weird combination of purchases!

    We had an issue with an on-line ink purchase and immediately after that purchase of ours, a string of on-line charges followed. The credit card company called us and we weren’t forced to pay for those charges that weren’t ours. It worked out much smoother than I anticipated.

    Banks have huge department devoted to this type of fraud.

  14. crisitunity / Jul 23 2008 9:46 am

    I find the purchases unbelievably hilarious. Carli, if you’re reading, I’m very sorry you had to go through this even for a weekend (my mom had her identity stolen and it was hell for her), but how can you not laugh at someone who buys $368 worth of Bibles on a STOLEN credit card?

    I know, right? Crazy.

  15. fawnahareo / Jul 23 2008 9:33 am

    I am speechless. What insanity.

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