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June 15, 2008 / Maleesha Kovnesky

It Ain’t Easy Bein’ Green…but it CAN be ironic

I know the thing to do lately is to Go Green:  cut out driving, stop using toxic laundry detergent, fashion your floors from bamboo, collect rainwater and use it to wash your hair, and make your cleaning products from lemon and lavender.  Also: ensure your tomatoes and eggs hail from local growers, use rechargeable batteries if you haven’t gotten a fifty foot solar panel yet, breathe out of one nostril to lower your carbon footprint, and stop eating manatee. 

In all seriousness, there is probably something that everyone can do to cut back a bit to cease being the Global Harbingers of Nastiness.  I just hope this greenness isn’t just a trend perpetuated by Darryl Hannah.  See, I had to suffer a trip through Wal-Mart today and I couldn’t help but notice that in the center of the store there was a large rack of car magnets…those ribbon ones that stick to the back of your car and come in so many colors and themes that we all stopped paying attention to them long ago. 

The imported car magnets were wrapped in plastic and had fancy packaging.  They were painted a dark green color and I’m betting the paint was not derived from broccoli.  The message?

GO GREEN!

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7 Comments

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  1. fawnahareo / Jun 26 2008 9:58 pm

    What? Why is collecting rainwater illegal? It might be sparse, but you can’t decide you’d rather use it on your tulips than your lawn?

  2. maleesha / Jun 16 2008 9:06 pm

    Oh, that’s right! Collecting rainwater is illegal in Colorado.

    I wish that wasn’t true, but it is. And you thought this was still a “free country” didn’t you?

    Read it Here

  3. pikespeakdenise / Jun 16 2008 8:51 pm

    I’d collect rainwater to wash my hair, but it’s illegal. Gotta protect those swimming pools in Nevada…

  4. cherikooka / Jun 16 2008 12:01 pm

    I want to be green…Kermit said it best:

    It’s not that easy bein’ green;
    Having to spend each day the color of the leaves.
    When I think it could be nicer being red, or
    yellow or gold-
    or something much more colorful like that.

    It’s not easy bein’ green.
    It seems you blend in with so many other
    ordinary things.
    And people tend to pass you over ’cause you’re
    not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water-
    or stars in the sky.

    But green’s the color of Spring.
    And green can be cool and friendly-like.
    And green can be big like an ocean, or important
    like a mountain, or tall like a tree.

    When green is all there is to be
    It could make you wonder why, but why wonder why?
    Wonder, I am green and it’ll do fine,
    it’s beautiful!
    And I think it’s what I want to be.

  5. Greg / Jun 16 2008 2:31 am

    I’m doing my part.I stopped eating Koala bear and I had my electricity shut off.

  6. Ian / Jun 15 2008 10:31 pm

    Mmmmmm…manatee…the other other OTHER white meat…

    Ian

  7. talea / Jun 15 2008 8:35 pm

    The only thing that could have been better is if they were trimmed with the fur of a rare and yet unnamed animal from the depths of the Madagascar rainforests.
    That version was probably on the other side of the stand.

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