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May 28, 2008 / Maleesha Kovnesky

Bike to Work

I’m going to do it.  I’m going to start riding my bike to work. 

I’ll keep emergency deodorant in my desk, and keep work shoes underneath.  I won’t ride too fast, because I don’t want to be too stinky at work, since I share on office.  I’m only willing to be up to a medium level of stinky.  I will also always wear a helmet, incase I get hit by a cell-phone using, makeup-applying bimbette in an Audi.

I’m not trying to make a statement of newfound greenery, because I don’t even recycle.  (That’s right…I admit it!  I throw cans and plastic away!  I contribute to the landfills of America on a regular basis!)

I’m also not making a statement against rising fuel prices.  Oh no, I love the fact that my wimpy clown car now costs $52 to fill up.  In Europe, my wimpy clown car would cost $142 to fill, so until then I won’t complain too loudly.  Plus I live a very short distance from work.  Not so short that a bike ride wouldn’t do me any good, but not so long that a bike ride is out of the question for my non-American Gladiator self.

I’m not going to ride my bike to work to make some freaky health statement, either, like lots of people who ride bikes to work do.  I’m not going to cast “Look how much better I am than you” glances at all the Toyota Tundras and Ford F-150s who whiz by (I’m not going to do that because then they might run me over).  I’m not going to admire my rockin’ legs in the mirror after I ride my bike all summer long, like I used to when I rode my bike everywhere in Virginia.

I’m certainly not going to ride my bike to work in order to be able to inject the fact into every conversation I have with people.  “Is that your bike?”  “Why yes, it certainly is.  I need new tires on it already…I ride it to work every day, you know.”  Oh I would never do that. 

I’m very excited about riding my bike.

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4 Comments

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  1. cherikooka / May 29 2008 4:23 pm

    I am very jealous!

  2. maleesha / May 29 2008 6:44 am

    There are bimbettes everywhere, Dave! Cool about your ride. And Ian, my husband totally wants a motorcycle one day to save gas. Yay for saying no to the Man! Or, at least to Big Oil!

  3. Ian Thomas Healy / May 28 2008 8:49 pm

    I live 16 miles from my job. It’s a little far to bike, so we’re going to buy a scooter or small motorsickle. And yes, I’m doing it as a statement against rising fuel costs. I filled my car last night at it took $75. Not that it couldn’t have taken more, but that’s when the pump stops. Bleh.

    Ian

  4. Dave / May 28 2008 7:31 pm

    You have bimbette’s in Audis up there? Really?

    Good for you. I used to ride my bike to work. Then I hurt my wrist and got back out of the habit. Then it was too hard with having to pick up/drop off kids. I’m starting to ride again in the evenings. At least, I went today and I’m hoping that’s the start of a trend. 🙂

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