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August 7, 2007 / Maleesha Kovnesky

Extreme Bust-up Flaming Nachos

Restaurant menus, especially at the big chain places, tend to use cutesy names for things instead of just calling chicken, chicken.  Instead of nachos, you have to choose between Flaming Extreme Nachos, Veggierific Nacho Bites, or Jalapeno Radish Combo Nachos.  It’s never chicken strips anymore, these once-plain items have evolved into Chicken Fingers (ewwww…chickens do not have fingers), Chicken Zingers, Chicken Chunks, or the occassional Chicken Dippers.  A well known example is Denny’s Eggs Over My Hammy.  Places like Outback Steakhouse are the worst–they have a theme going on top of the weird names.  Everything there is ‘Roo this, or Wallaby that, and as tasty as these items are…I just can’t ask for them by the name listed in the menu.

So what usually happens is, I see something in the menu that sounds good, but I can’t bear to actually speak the words,  I will say, “I’ll have, uh, this…” and point lamely at the item.  At that point, the waitperson will loudly announce, “Oh, you want the Bonzai Bomber Burger?”  And I will shrink at the sound of the exaggerated, ridiculous title bestowed upon a hamburger

Does anyone else out there have this problem?

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4 Comments

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  1. pikespeakdenise / Aug 10 2007 1:56 pm

    I loudly and sarcastically say their stupid menu item names–“I’ll have the CLAMDIGGER’S CLAM CHOWDER, he’ll have the CHICK-CHICK CHICKEN FINGERS and she’ll have the RED ROBINETTI SPAGHETTI”–embarrassing the wait person instead. Then I ask if the Red Robin would personally visit us so that my children can hide under the table instead of eat. 😉

  2. Christine / Aug 9 2007 12:59 am

    YES!! I too have this problem and usually pick something in a picture or just point to the menu before I hand it to the waiter. Except I don’t point lamely. I stab the menu with my finger and an emphatic “THIS”. heh

  3. Ian / Aug 7 2007 12:24 pm

    It’s like the Bulwer-Lytton version of naming foods.

    Ian

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