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July 14, 2005 / Maleesha Kovnesky

Schedules, and other things

I am the LAST PERSON to make schedules. It isn’t that I don’t think they are important. I am notorious for being ten minutes early to everything. I seem to have lots of places to be, because I am always hurrying to go somewhere. With a full time job, small baby, book club, grocery store trips, doctor visits, Internet addiction and pursuit of a Master’s degree, I really find myself needing to make a schedule.

I have tried buying personal organizers–you know, those nice zippable binders that come in all sizes, colors and textures. They have flaps for addresses, phone numbers, maps, notes, dates, and some even have a pop-up umbrella. Well I write in those for about a week and then I forget to use them. I resort back to my system of using sticky notes and writing down important appointment information on the back of old receipts.

One of the little known secrets about having a baby is: the baby is really Not Just Yours. The baby has grandparents, great-grandparents, friends of friends, aunts, uncles, and clowns from space who want to visit. Summer, which used to be a time to plan fun vacations to exciting destinations, becomes the Season to Bring the Baby Places. This causes lots of conflict within the calendars of all family members. Its much worse when there have been divorces within the family, because now the baby has twice as many stops when doing the Grandparent rounds. And no matter to the good intentions of baby’s parents, some grandparent is going to feel not as grandparentey as they feel they should.

The whole point of this is that suddenly making a schedule, and keeping a schedule, becomes a real chore. I used to pride myself of NOT making schedules – I like the freedom to just do whatever the heck I feel like doing. But babies living in the 21st century require lots of planning, logistics, supplies, and even a larger vehicle. How did any of our parents raise us?

I am really disappointed that the summer of 2006 is already being structured for our wee little family. I want to have whole, unplanned months–a blank slate of a calendar. I want the future to be a surprise. Planning it all out and having it written in front of me is very…depressing.

Planning is why life goes by faster as you get older.

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